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"Erm, I'm not really sure to be honest with you - it's been quite a while since I've bought one of these"She chuckled and said, "Hmm, they all say that".I must have looked a little embarrassed, because she quickly reached forward and touched my arm saying, "Don't worry, I'm only teasing. Come, let me show you my range. To be honest with you, one of the perks of this job is being able to browse the merchandise myself, without having to pay." That warm smile settled me, as she walked to the back of the store to her bookshelf. I followed, not able to take my eyes from her beautifully rounded behind. She was not fat by any means, but she had a matronly grace about her."Here we are. We have the usual Penthouse, and Playboy type magazines, if that's what you are looking for - or I also have this Buxom Wench magazine - do you like big women?" she asked sounding interested in my response."Well, yes I do actually, that's certainly one I may get." I couldn't help but drop my gaze and look at. This was not the way to sink into blissful mediocrity. I thought about purposefully getting answers wrong, but when my name was called my Pavlovian little brain insisted on spitting out the right ones.The one answer I couldn’t figure out was how to escape my role as the geek of the class. Then, one morning, the glimmer of an answer appeared.It started when Eddie — the first-baseman — and I were serving 6 a.m. Mass. It was a cozy affair, three old ladies, one snoozing bum, Fr. Pascalitis and us, all alone in a church the size of a zeppelin hangar. You don’t know what early morning is until you’ve spent one trying to prop your eyes open in a barn filled with the scent of decades-old incense while some guy’s snores are turned into the drone of a Sopwith Camel by the echoing walls.Not that Eddie and I worried too much about what would happen if we did take a nap. Fr. Pascalitis, who we suspected knew Latin so well because his parents had spoken it as a.
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