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The secret life, however, fades in the selective company of friends, colleagues, and family. And we have found liberation in living honestly; should it matter then that our building members know us as ‘family friends’? If you met us, you would be able to tell that we are practical romantics—levelheaded and reckless in equal measure. A colleague had introduced us, in May 2015, during a coffee round. She didn’t look like a ‘lesbian’, if that’s even a thing, and if that’s what you’re wondering. It was an unlikely script. And it all started with, ‘I love your haircut’.Coco Chanel once stated, ‘A woman who cuts her hair is about to change her life’. It’s true. I was announcing, without really announcing, ‘moving on’ with the ‘breakup cut’. The let’s-cut-it-all-off-haircut was a statement of personal empowerment, an adieu to an affecting three-year relationship with a Hungarian woman I had fallen madly in love with during my sabbatical in London. My first serious lesbian relationship. I. Eventually she cried softly. “No more... please... enough...” Her thighs fell away from my head and her body slumped back on the rug, limp and utterly spent. I sat back on my heels and looked at the woman I loved, now merely a ragdoll on the rug, her arms and legs splayed helplessly apart. I moved between her open thighs, erection in hand, ready to add my semen to the extraordinary mix within her but some reason, paused. After all they had just done and we had just done, forcing my body into hers suddenly seemed unnecessary. My cock stood firm, rigid, erect and ready to do its duty but this time I didn’t feel the need to claim her as mine after all. Was this the ultimate act of submission? Knowing that my wife’s sweet body was full of another man’s seed, unprotected, unsafe and with pregnancy a real possibility? And yet not feeling driven to try and force my own seed ahead of his? Willing to sit back and let nature take its course? I felt a strange feeling of serenity pass over me.
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