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The boss only kept her around to brighten the office. She was cheaper than hiring rubber plants. She could type, just about, but when she had her chair far enough back for her to reach the keyboard, she couldn't see the screen. Barbara was practically useless, apart - it was said - in bed. But she couldn't even count up to twenty-eight each month without taking all her clothes off so she could use her toes. She was, in a word, totally indispensable. Two words, in fact.Derek, the shipping manager, appeared with a mouthful of cheese roll and a pile of paperwork. "Here you go, Loose, the usual Thursday stuff. I'm off this afternoon, any chance you could get the top half finished by lunchtime? The rest isn't so urgent..." Of course!" Derek was so dishy. If she hadn't still been married to Kostakis when she'd joined the firm, she would have jumped at Derek. Not literally, of course. It would have scared him off for good. Lucinda Long, she thought, not a bad name. So much more melodious. We needed to move due to Elaines job as a reception class teacher and rented a flat in Birmingham city centre. It was not the best block of flats or the best area, but as we had to move quickly it was all that was available. Elaine started work the following week. I had bumped into a couple of the people living in neighbouring flats and I got chatting with a 60 something guy from the flat below named Lenny. He was unemployed divorced and seemed lonely. I started to pop into his place for a coffee and chat and invited him back to our flat to return the hospitality. Sarah had seen Lenny on the landing and she called him lecherous Lenny because she said she felt his eyes undressing her each time she passed him. She said he gave her the creeps. One afternoon Lenny came up and as I was making the coffee he pulled a half bottle of rum from his pocket. He said he was an ex merchant seam an and enjoyed his grog. He poured a good measure into each coffee and we drank it. The conversation.
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