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After all, I was a single 35 year old. I was sure I could find something to do. As I stood in line to check on to the boat, I happened to notice a woman who was a couple of people in front of me. I reckoned by the look of her facial features, she was possibly ten or so years older than me. And going by her facial features alone, she was nothing special. I wouldn’t say she was all that pretty even. As for her body, she was kind of on the short side. I’d say she was a good foot or so shorter than me, which put her at 5’2” probably. She also wasn’t very skinny. And that was putting things nicely. The woman was certainly on the plump side, and that may have been putting things generously as well. But what the woman lacked in classical beauty she more than made up for in chest size. I’m not k**ding! Her breasts were enormous. And somehow they managed to look plump, even though they hung down to probably her belly button. All I could do was stare at them, and frequently gasp at the sight.. Get me a better seat, and I’ll give you a handsome tip”. The usher moves him into the second row, and the man hands the usher a quarter. Yep. 25 cents. The usher looks at the quarter in his hand, leans over and whispers “The wife did it”.A man stood outside his house after a bitter divorce and noticed a crate of beer bottles. He took out an empty bottle and smashed it onto the wall swearing “You are the reason I don’t have a wife”. He smashed the second bottle “You are the reason I don’t have children”. He smashed the third bottle “You are the reason I don’t have a job”. When he took the fourth bottle, he realized that the bottle was still SEALED and filled with beer. He said to the bottle “YOU STAND ASIDE, I KNOW YOU WERE NOT INVOLVED”.An explorer in the deepest Amazon suddenly finds himself surrounded by a bloodthirsty group of cannibals. Upon surveying the situation, he says quietly to himself “Oh God, I’m fucked”. Suddenly there is a ray of light from the sky above and a voice.
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