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The turnout was well over what the chamber festival had drawn earlier in the summer. There was a grand total of seventeen trebuchets at the event in several classes down to junior high kid size (firing oranges, rather than pumpkins). Big John wasn't the biggest trebuchet there; a guy from Pennsylvania had brought one he called Stone Horse, half again as large and easily capable of outranging the local catapult -- and leaving Bert muttering things about an escalation in the medieval arms race.They also trotted out the air guns that afternoon. Emily had never seen Bert's big air cannon in use until then, but it could toss a pumpkin well over half a mile. With a favorable wind, a pumpkin with good flight characteristics and a bit of luck, the air gun, named Saint Vincent for no reason she could understand, got a shot close to three quarters of a mile to win the air gun category and salvage some bragging rights for the home team.Malvern Hill still only boasted two Napoleons -- one of. And let's face it, you were ... are hot. But, it only took a few minutes before I refined my thoughts and you became my good friend George's mother. End of sexual discussion.RUTH: Well, what you've described is pretty typical of pubescent boys. I just don't think that men hold that as they mature.ME: Ben, did you think of the young women in this room sexually this evening?BEN: Boy, you put a guy right on the spot, don't you, Brian? You do realize that's my wife sitting beside you, right?ME: Yes, but we promised to be honest with each other tonight.BEN: Honestly? Yes. [Little gasp.] But. It wasn't when I walked on set or even when I was watching your little sketch. I thought it a couple hours ago. Something along the lines of 'if I was thirty years younger... ' Then I put it out of my mind. I'm not thirty years younger. I have a wife I adore. While the notion of an admittedly hot young sorority woman gives a guy my age a quick jolt, I have made my choice and I know where my happiness.
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