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Enough was completed so that the rooms could be used as we needed them for interviews and the physical evaluations. They were already putting Mason cubicles together opposite the private offices for the clerks and secretaries. The phones lines and computer wiring were already done and waiting for the plug and play people.Two of the new big air conditioning/heat pump units had been installed on the loading dock. All the ceiling units had been installed in all the offices and were working. It was a good thing.Marcy and Jason were going to interview for more office help on Monday, including a personal secretary and two assistants for him, along with another dozen clerks. The admin work was mind boggling. There were stacks of information waiting to be input into the system everywhere and it was growing every day.Marcy, Lorrie, Ching Lee and Vicky were all going to get another full time clerk assigned to them to try to catch up and stay ahead of it. We were going to add two more. My ... we were worried I might go into early labor. It took days for me to calm down, and after I did, I couldn't figure out how to explain this," she said, gesturing at her stomach.I didn't know what to say. I was upset. There was no doubt about that. Thoughts of her were what had got me through those years; and, here she was, pregnant and most likely married to another man. But I couldn't hate her, either. I was dead. That's what everyone believed, and she couldn't put her life on hold forever."You're right, I guess, it's just ... I have thought about you a lot. I played our reunion through, so many times in my head."We just sat and avoided eye contact for more than a minute. This was so awkward it was painful. There was nothing she could say that would make me not feel pain, and nothing I could say that wouldn't just be an attempt to make her feel guilty. There really isn't forgiveness in this situation, since no one did anything wrong, and yet acceptance seemed impossible."How.
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