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It was hard for Sharon and Katie to tell the real genders ofthe other schoolgirls in the picture as they did not recognise them butthey knew Davina and Samantha had once thought of themselves as men."Okay," Katie said. "How do we get Alexander to dress like that?" Firstly Alexander has already seen the pictures and knows what I did toDavina and secondly -watch me." Naomi said. She called Alexander intoher room. "I used to like these biscuits when I was a little girl,"Naomi said offering Alexander a biscuit."So did I," Alexander replied. "I meant when I was a little boy!" Are you sure that that was not a Freudian slip and you don't have athing for dresses like Davina, Alexandra?" Naomi asked."I am a man and men don't wear dresses!" Alexander replied."You didn't answer the question, Alexandra. Look, if you are a real manyou should be able to beat someone like Davina at arm-wrestling. If youcan beat Davina at arm wrestling we will be your slaves for the week, butif Davina beats. It was a shame though that nearly every word out of her cute sensuous mouth was pretty much a fib, if not an outright lie. No surprise. It goes with the territory. It was the lovely but crazy, crazy eyes ... divine, but deliciously bughouse. Just looking into them made my toe-hairs curl!When you’re Christmas Town’s only private investigator, you don’t tend to get the more honest and upright citizens for clients. Like the town’s snowplows and weekly garbage collection, I deal with all of steaming reindeer crap that everyone else tries to pretend doesn’t exist here in our winter wonderland utopia.Think about it ... it’s Christmas here the other 364 days of the year too, complete with all of the stress and dysfunction of that day of the year times two or two-hundred. There isn’t enough magic Christmas snow in the entire North Pole to keep everyone’s holiday spirits bright every single fucking day of your entire unnaturally long life. At some point even the jolliest toyshop elf is going.
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