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He paused for a moment and then started to leave. The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, ‘I saw that ... You didn’t put any money in the poor box!’ The Irishman replied, ‘Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and according to you, that’s the same as putting it in!’Lemon Squeeze There once was a religious young woman who went to Confession. Upon entering the confessional, she said, ‘Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.’ The priest said, ‘Confess your sins and be forgiven.’ The young woman said, ‘Last night my boyfriend made passionate love to me seven times.’ The priest thought long and hard and then said, ‘Squeeze seven lemons into a glass and then drink the juice.’ The young woman asked, ‘Will this cleanse me of my sins?’ The priest said, ‘No, but it will wipe that smile off of your face.’Catholic Dog Muldoon lived alone in the Irish countryside with only a pet dog for company. One day the dog died, and Muldoon went to the parish priest and asked, ‘Father,. " Ashley was speaking from the heart. Tears rolled down her cheeks, and she was sober today. The twins and I shared a worried look, and than Nina said "Do it Jeff. You need to help not only your best friend, but ours." Ashley lifted her shirt, and started biting her lip. "I just want it to be me and you Jeffrey. Girls, I'm sure you understand." she said. The twins were not going to be involved in this at all. This made me a little nervous, because I had sex with them every time another woman was involved. "Of course, we understand Ashley." Nina said. The twins got the kids dressed and took them out for breakfast. "See you later honey," Nancy said. "Mommy, why is daddy staying home with that lady?" My son, Kyle asked. "He is helping her with a project for work Kyle." Nancy said. The door closed. It was just me and Ashley. My heart was racing now. We were sitting alone on the couch. Ashley suddenly attacked me. She grabbed my shoulders and brought my lips to hers. She pressed her lips.
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