This time there was a man standing there."Are you alright?" he asked. "Fine," I said. "You look a little unsteady. How about I walk you home? Quite dangerous on the streets for a pretty girl." Thank you," I said knowing this must be my rapist. Only he would have said this. "You live close?" he asked swiping his card against my head. It beeped twice. "Sure," I said playing my part. "Just around the corner." Come on, then," he said and took me by the arm and helped me as I tottered unsteadily along the street. We turned into a dark side street. He gripped my arm tightly and I knew it was only a matter of time until he jumped me but I was now so tired and drunk I couldn't feel scared. I simply wanted to get it over with. We passed an alley and he pushed me inside. I fell to the ground and he dragged me by my hair into the darkness. I didn't scream, simply let myself get dragged along until we reached the end of the alley way. He jumped on top of me, cobblestones digging painfully into. ”“Well, then it sounds pretty sure,” I told her. I was quiet again. “So, what do you want to do? I mean, are you going to keep it -”“Oh, I’m going to keep it,” she said emphatically. Then, in a softer voice, “I guess God just wanted to make sure we stayed together.”“Maybe,” I replied. Ordinarily I’m against abortion, but I was quickly learning I could make an exception. “Ah - dang, I got to go, I have to get off this exit, and don’t want to crash. I’ll call you later, all right?”“Are you OK?” she asked me, a touch of sarcasm in her voice.“Sure - just need to think.”We hung up. And I had to think. Oh, boy do I have to think.And so I thought. I told my wife I was just distracted by something at work. I went out on a drive. I sat in an empty parking lot, looking up at the stars, wanting to beg God to make it not true. I didn’t dare. I knew it was all of my own making, and I didn’t deserve to be rescued from my fate.I went home and played with my daughter. My wife must have known that.
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