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Sleeze/Bothced. I was introduced to this lady and yes she was of legal age, 29 I think. Before me she had only dated African American men but for some reason we clicked and she had part of my dark weird humor in her but we got together at her apartment and before we even took our clothes off she started telling me all this crap about why before me she had only dated black men and the last one she said had a big penis and they were broke up and he was living with another woman and they had a small baby but any time of the day or night if he called she would let him come over because she said he was big down low and knew how to use it. Well I am average size and at first I didn't like her attitude so me and my dark humor kicked in. Now know this the lady in question was hot as hell with blonde hair and nice body and pretty face. I decided to teach her a lesson and pretend I had erectile dysfunction and believe me it was hard to pull it off so I had to think of little old ladies in. I could do with a panty liner right now!" I'm quite restricted myself, actually." He shuffled in his chair.I was enjoying this cool sexual banter. Boldly taking a swig of my wine, I nonchalantly asked, with an angelic smile, "Hard?" Very!" I'm so pleased I'm having that effect on you. Tell me, did you ever see a movie called 'Shampoo'?" I'm not sure. Remind me of the plot."I paused, while ever-attentive Mario delivered a huge bowl of dressed salad to our table, then shuffled off to the kitchens."It's quite old. Mid-70s probably. Nixon-era political comedy. Warren Beatty is a suave ladies' hairdresser, and at a formal dinner party, his girlfriend Julie Christie climbs under the table and gives him a blow job. Just like that! On screen!" I took a bread stick, snapped it dramatically in half and gave a wicked grin. "Pity these tables haven't got tableclothes!"Tony's reaction was to half-choke on his first forkeful of lettuce and olives. "Jeez!"Two plates of piping hot deep-pan pizzas.
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