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.. but to be honest, I had the same tendencies even before we were lovers, I just hadn't learned how to express them. I'm just one of those strange people who enjoy sexual pain, and ... humiliation ... and excess ... as a kind of antidote. Like a chemical balance in my life. And once I tried it - after all, I suggested Sarah tie me up first. It wasn't her idea at all - I knew that stuff was for me ... Sarah unlocked it, and I think ... I think Margaret defined me sexually. She taught me how to really focus and take pleasure from the right sort of pain."I cried a little as I remembered the good times with my Mistress, and how the delicious agonies I suffered at her hands had acted as a balm upon my troubled soul. The moment passed. Her vile duplicity could still made me coldly furious."Shit Steve, in a way, once I went on the run with Sarah, I had nowhere else to go but here. Losing her for the second time hurt too much, and I just had ... I think I needed to hit rock-bottom. I needed. Monday evening came and the front door opened . My heart banged, missed a beat and started normally again . Abit like a car with a misfire !. I could not back out now , Dee had put all her faith in me and I could not let her down and If I did at worse I would end up being punished for it by Jenny forever. So, on with the plan… being a chef I made a beautiful meal which was nicely keeping warm in the oven, the table nicely laid with candles and flowers ..the full works! . I greeted Jenny with a big (Fake!) smile and she said ‘ooh …something smells nice’ . She dropped her coat (as always expecting me to put it away) and her bags . She saw the table and said ‘ Ooo what’s all this in aid of then.. I might just order a pizza ‘ in a sassy voice looking at me to see if she had hurt me . I ignored that comment and that bothered her. ‘You going to pour me a glass then?’ Even though the wine was open I just took her by the hand and lead her upstairs . I started to kiss her neck from behind.
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