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You think your stiff upper lip makes you above the rest of us.Look at me ... I'm ME! I have Italian blood, Greek blood, a little Irish blood, and some Aborigine blood. What do you say to that?"The Englishman replied,"Awfully sporting of your mother, old chap!"This one is compliments of Misguided ChildA businessman was preparing to go on a long business trip, so he thought he'd buy his wife something to keep her occupied. He went to a sex shop and explained his situation. The man there said, ' Well, I don't know that I have anything that will keep her occupied for so many weeks, except ... the MagicPenis!'The husband said, 'The what'?The man repeated, 'The Magic Penis, ' and pulled out what seemed to be an ordinary dildo.The husband laughed, and said, 'It looks like a dildo!'The man then pointed to the door and said, ' Magic Penis, door!'The penis rose out of its box, darted over to the door and started pounding away at the keyhole. The whole door shook wildly with vibrations, so much. How was your day?" Wonderful! I tracked Hannibal into a tiny settlement where Tangier will someday be. Uh, at least in our old timeline. Their boats got there a few minutes before 6 PM, just as the sun was setting." Hmm?" Alvaro was puzzled for a moment, thinking that sunset today was at 6:38 PM. But then he remembered Tangier was more than ten degrees east of Funchal. "Ah..." he sighed, "my saucy wench. What sexy feet you have..." Hmm... Just keep up what you're doing. We goddesses know how to reward such loyal affection." Indeed?" Alvaro grinned. "Such as?" Ha! We goddesses also don't reveal all our intentions. It makes us more mysterious that way. I promise, you won't be disappointed." Okay! Sounds like a plan... So, I take it Hannibal is all right?" Yep. There was no excitement at Tangier either. Hannibal runs a tight crew. I don't think they told anybody yet about us." Well sure, that's smart. It might take them two months to reach Sidon. This world might not have invented much.
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