Such friendship is so rare, it may as well be considered impossible to find. But naturally even she disappeared from my life just as easily as the rest, especially when the love of my life told me he fantasized about her. I could never see her the same way as before, after picturing him entering her, even if it was his sick daydream. Sometimes I pick up the box, the one we all have somewhere hidden in our homes or garages or storage units. The one with the dried flowers, cards, letters, mixed tapes, stuffed animals, dirty photos, anything he or she might have left behind. I have letters that I read. Text and email transcripts. Some horrible poetry. I bring this box out when I need to cry and can’t, but now it doesn’t work for me anymore. I read the letters, wonder if their wives have ever seen some of the shit I’ve written, and try like hell to cry or feel or anything. And I can’t. I picture the sex. I picture the cocks. And I can’t feel. I can’t cry. Not until I remember that I. Suddenly, with a look of embarrassment on his face, Mac excused himself and left for the spare bathroom.After a short while, when Mac returned to the bedroom to announce that he was going downstairs, he had a slightly flushed look on his face.When Darcy made his way downstairs for a cup of coffee, Mac joined him in the kitchen. As he went about preparing his coffee, Mac constantly got in his way and he continually had to brush past Mac who became a deliberate obstruction. The affectionate look that he had observed Darcy with early that morning had also returned and intensified. Darcy hoped that he was misreading Mac’s facial expression and it was simply one of gratitude. Still, it unnerved him a little. Darcy then quickly finished his coffee and returned to the bedroom for the rest of his shift.Mac did momentarily pop in later to say goodnight, before heading off to the spare room.The following morning, the same procedure as the day before played out before Darcy left. On this.
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