.... If you want to be a car press 87, if you want to be a brassiere... Jeff had grown so tired that he forgot what the early numbers were. He slowly pressed #1. The voice replied You have chosen 1 woman. If this is correct hit 1 if not press 0. Please press now. Okay I'll press 1. To become a blonde press123456789987654321, to become a brunette press 2 to have black hair press 3, to be a redhead press 4, to have an exotic hair color press 5, to be bald press 6. What was that number for blonde? Oh well forget it. I'd rather be a redhead anyway. You have pressed 4 redhead. If that is correct press 1 if not press 0. Okay. If you want to be 5'5 or shorter press 1, if you want to be 5'6 to 5'11 press 2 if you want to be 6 foot or taller press 3. Okay I think I'll press 2. You have hit 2 this means you want to be between 5'6 and 5'11. If this is correct yada yada yada. He knew the drill by now. The operator gave him the usual warnings and gave him the final chance to back. 50 each.I'll back up me truck ready to load 'em on, so I will."The owner of the shop said quietly, "You're from out west of Dublin, aren't you?" Well yes," said a surprised Paddy. "What gave it away?"The owner replied, "This is a dry-cleaners."These are compliments of the web magicianThey Walk Among Us ... and they vote...And What is Even Worse, they ReproduceMy neighbor bought a new fridge for his house.To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: "Free to good home. You want it, you take it."For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it.He eventually decided that people were too untrusting of this deal.It looked too good to be true, so he changed the sign to read:"Fridge for sale $50."The next day someone stole it.Caution... They Walk Among Us and They Vote!At the airport.Official: " Has anyone put anything into your bags without your knowledge?"Traveller: "Sir, if they had done it without my knowledge, how.
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