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I didn’t feel anything – no rush, no gush, no butterflies. I knew I wasn’t gay, and wasn’t this a KISS? Everyone I know talks about kisses like they’re the most radical things on the planet, next to the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, and yet there I was, feeling no different than I had four years ago as an awkward junior high schooler. In fact, I felt more awkward than I’d ever felt in my entire life, especially with Jeff gazing into my eyes as if we had just shared together a most magical moment. Surely there had to be so much more than this! Would this night every make for a good tale of late-night, high school debauchery? Would it remain forever encased in the annals of the Best Kissing Comedy of the Centuries? And what about poor, disappointed me? Would I remain eternally imprisoned in the aftermath of the most horrid of all anticlimactic finales of my life, never wanting to kiss anyone ever again until I died 93 years later? Well I couldn’t just break things off with Jeff, he. Pride was something that I had never known him show where I was concerned before. Considering what a fuck up I'd made of just about everything in my life up to that point, I had some trouble understanding that smile.That night as a family, we all went out for a meal together, after which some heavy drinking took place. It might sound odd - and I got a few strange looks from the family of beer drinkers - but I found myself drinking quite a bit of wine during the evening, a habit that I'd picked up in France. Although it was nice to get back to some decent beer for a change.I know that I consumed a little more than I usually did and I'd been mixing my drinks a lot more than is prudent, but it was a family celebration after all. Anyway even in my inebriated state, I did feel that there was something not quite normal about the atmosphere and almost every one of my relatives' behaviour. They obviously asked me about my travels, but not one of them ever mentioned Codi by name. As a matter.
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