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.. Who are you?” It’s a very friendly greeting, but very fake too.Our guest is well spoken, with a soft and friendly west country accent that suggests she’s a little shy, her answer delivered to camera rather than to the animated slut ‘beside’ her. “Hello, my name is Maria Sinclair. I’m a 55 year old mother of two, and grandmother of one. I’m from Bristol in the South West of England, and after 32 years of marriage I’m so bored I think I’m about to explode!”We cut to a montage of her walking in the countryside, summer dress blowing in the breeze, walking a very active and happy dog. This is intercut with footage of her being interviewed (on the hillside) in close-up, and occasional photographs to illustrate her life story, etc.She monologues her story over the top of these clips.“My dear husband, God bless him, seems to think that fifteen minutes of sex every few weeks, and that’s fifteen minutes including what he considers to be foreplay, is enough to keep us going and satisfied. I. “I have no idea. I found the scene as described after gaining entry to the room. Captain Hutton expired in my arms, thankful he had foiled a dastardly attempt on the life of our future Queen.”Callum laughed. “You are not addressing a court martial, Jack. Never mind the official version, just give me the truth.”After I related the complete, true, story Callum clapped me on the shoulder.“You should be the man to receive all the plaudits and praise. Scaling a tower, grappling with a man armed with a crossbow, and narrowly escaping death.”I explained Captain Hutton’s circumstances, and how my version of events would ensure Mrs Hutton and her children would have some recompense for the loss of her husband.“You are more than decent, Jack. Will the corporal support your version of events?”“Yes, Truman is a good man. It was he who had the idea, and the skill, to blow the door off its hinges. His plan was not entirely successful, but the explosion distracted Wilhelm Erzählenmann, and allowed.
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